Got to get in touch with my literary,musical and girly side more often.

Reflecting about life

I love long bus rides. It always gives me time to think about life and well, since i don't actually own an ipod and my phone has almost no battery all the time, i occupy myself by looking out of the window and making observations in my head. There're so many things that i should be, could be doing at this very moment in time, but i have no idea why i'm not doing those. I've let people down, i've made some people happy, but what meaning does my life have? I am somewhat materialistic, i'm not perfect, neither am i an overachiever that is on the route of success. Sometimes, i just don't know what to think anymore.

My new baby!

Finally got it from Yamaha and i can't wait to be able to play it likka pro! Been wanting to learn it since long ago, and i do mean long ago like Primary/Secondary School long but i just never got the chance to. Imprints on fingers? The results will be worth it!!! Can't wait till end of Sat to fully enjoy learning to play!!!

Hey-Oh to Week 3

Am gonna miss my babezzzz who's gone off to London for like 4 years.......... and i didn't get to send her off. Major Sigh. Glad i got to catch up with her and the rest like a week before she left though, major memories forevazxs and am gonna go to LONDON while she's there...someday.

Work's well, mundane and the same-o same-o. Gives a whole new meaning to the term TGIF though cause this time i can actually feel the excitement when it's thursday and friday and leading up to the weekend. Wednesday's the new day i hate most, midweek is a hell lot worse than Mondays, trust me.

Week 2

Week 2 of internship -

x Had lunch with these 2 cutesy tutsies on Wednesday at TP, had to figure a way out of the uluest part of the world...

x This whole system is so new to me i gotta get used to it

x Trying to find a definitive style for myself, is it something that can be made or even seen by yourself?

x FINDING MY PURPOSE IN LIFE

x ways to make my life more enriching.

x NEED. MORE. DRAMA. IN LIFE.

Be the trend, don't follow the trend

Freedom from judgments and trends, i'm just going to be the best me there ever was. Who cares what is right or what is wrong, who has the right to say what is right or wrong, i'm my own person and i'm my own self, on the way to making myself a better me.

Monday Morning

One more week to the end of my miserable week of studying, what better way to end off the week than with my birthday, right? Except for the fact that well, it means i'm becoming older and older and nooooo time should just stop now. i'm 18 and i love it and i'm going to be 18 forever!!

My current snack obsession.... Raisins! I could finish the entire packet within like, an hour and they are so addictive and so......... hopefully healthy ):

I think i dont have an affinity with phone chargers because its a second time mine has died in like 2 years. Both Samsung chargers (Just saying) mysteriously refused to work even though i havent done anything to it! Hate technology and now i've gotta use the usb cable to charge my phone which means that i've gotta turn on the laptop which undeniable is a major source of distraction to charge it and it takes a gazillion years to charge. Or i could turn it off but the idea of being unconnected scares me. When did technology start to take over my life without me even knowing it? What happened to days where i would go out and cycle around the neighbourhood, go for a swim, play card games.. oh wait, that was my childhood which unfortunately for most of today's children ceases to exist. I remember as a kid i was always going over to neighbour's houses to play (not electronic games) and being jealous over people who always had the newest electronic games which i didn't or even if i did i had to share. Come to think of it now, i'm glad i didnt have those. It gave me the chance to explore the natural world, pick the red flowers and pull out the stem that has some juice in it, (no idea what its called) and to just run around and play. These days i'm stuck inside, spending hours online watching dramas or on the television during my breaks. Major realisation. New goal - During the measly one week break before the dreaded internship, one week fast of no internet, no tv and just fun filled days before the 6 months of doom comes. Anyone with any idea of how to have fun outside please please please tell me okay!

On a Whim

Well i woke up today after hitting the sack at 12(Relatively early considering it's exam period) and a gazillion thoughts hit my mind like it does everyday.

This describes it perfectly, except instead of shoes it should also be clothes and accessories and evrything nice.

Ode to a wonderful 3 years

On Friday it was the last group presentation for this sem, which would be the last i'm ever going to do in NP, Mixed feelings - Happy to get it out of the way, sad cause it means the life that i have gotten so used to is going to end as it is! Our presentation was a major success, refreshing style that was kinda tough considering we only started preparing on the morning itself but well done everyone!! :)

As the saying goes, friends come and go, and keeping friendships alive is all about who is willing to make the first move to keep the friendship going. As far as i know, I would want to keep this friendship between the 6 of us going strong and alive! It's hard to find a group where you can click with, much less a group which kinda balances each other out and having similar interests. They have definitely made my life in poly hell lots better and more wonderful, but i'll save the many stories for a post during graduation (which is far too early now to be counting my eggs before they hatch)

Meanwhile, back to studying for the last exam papers in a while.. (but not before i finish watching Australia)

It feels like i'm running the last stretch of a race, with every step i take i'm getting closer to the finish. But my legs are weakening, my breath is quickening and my heart is unable to keep up. All that is keeping me going is my mind. Will it stay strong?

Hanging up on you

It's only Tuesday and i'm all burnt out. Try a week of Presentations every other day, Last project report due on Friday, Solution Selling scenario on Friday, staying out late on Monday and Wednesday = a very tired girl. I'm dreaming of a day (no make that a week) off with nothing but blue skies, clear water, gorgeous sun... fulfill my dreams someone? :)

A Father' message beyond the grave

A FATHER'S RULES FOR FINDING FULFILLMENT

1. Be courteous, be punctual, always say please and thank you, and be sure to hold your knife and fork properly. Others take their cue on how to treat you from your manners.

2. Be kind, considerate and compassionate when others are in trouble, even if you have problems of your own. Others will admire your selflessness and will help you in due course.

3. Show moral courage. Do what is right, even if that makes you unpopular. I always thought it important to be able to look at myself in the shaving mirror every morning and not feel guilt or remorse. I depart this world with a pretty clear conscience.

4.Show humility. Stand your ground but pause to reflect on what the other side are saying, and back off when you know you are wrong. Never worry about losing face. That only happens when you are pig-headed.

Learn from your mistakes. You will make plenty so use them as a learning tool. If you keep making the same mistake or run into a problem, you’re doing something wrong.

5. Avoid disparaging someone to a third party; it is only you who will look bad. If you have a problem with someone, tell them face to face.

6.Hold fire! If someone crosses you, don’t react immediately. Once you say something it can never be taken back, and most people deserve a second chance.

7. Have fun. If this involves taking risks, so be it. If you get caught, hold your hands up.

8.Give to charity and help those who are less fortunate than yourselves: it’s easy and so rewarding.

9.Always look on the upside! The glass is half full, never half empty. Every adversity has a silver lining if you seek it out.

10. Make it your instinct always to say ‘yes’. Look for reasons to do something, not reasons to say no. Your friends will cherish you for that.

11.Be canny: you will get more of what you want if you can give someone more of what they desire. Compromise can be king.

12. Always accept a party invitation. You may not want to go, but they want you there. Show them courtesy and respect.

13. Never ever let a friend down. I would bury bodies for my friends, if they asked me to . . . which is why I have chosen them carefully.

14. Always tip for good service. It shows respect. But never reward poor service. Poor service is insulting.

15.Always treat those you meet as your social equal, whether they are above or below your station in life. For those above you, show due deference, but don’t be a sycophant.

16. Always respect age, as age equals wisdom.

17.Be prepared to put the interests of your sibling first.

18. Be proud of who you are and where you come from, but open your mind to other cultures and languages. When you begin to travel (as I hope you will), you’ll learn that your place in the world is both vital and insignificant. Don’t get too big for your breeches.

19. Be ambitious, but not nakedly so. Be prepared to back your assertions with craftsmanship and hard work.

20. Live every day to its full: do something that makes you smile or laugh, and avoid procrastination.

21. Give of your best at school. Some teachers forget that pupils need incentives. So if your teacher doesn’t give you one, devise your own.

22. Always pay the most you can afford. Never skimp on hotels, clothing, shoes, make-up or jewellery. But always look for a deal. You get what you pay for.

23. Never give up! My two little soldiers have no dad, but you are brave, big-hearted, fit and strong. You are also loved by an immensely kind and supportive team of family and friends. You make your own good fortune, my children, so battle on.

24. Never feel sorry for yourself, or at least don’t do it for long. Crying doesn’t make things better.

25. Look after your body and it will look after you.

26. Learn a language, or at least try. Never engage a person abroad in conversation without first greeting them in their own language; by all means ask if they speak English!

27. And finally, cherish your mother, and take very good care of her.

I love you both with all my heart.

Daddy x

Fruitful Friday

1. Scholarship Presentation Ceremony today, thankfully my in-very-poor-shape heels were able to get me from my seat to the presenter and back to my seat in one piece without falling. Thank the heavens! Saw so many familiar people, OMF-ers mostly! They had a presentation about the OMF Challenge and it brought back so many memories. Imagine seeing my photos in the coming years being presented to the juniors, why didn't i take part in more TCP Activities!

2. See the medal there? Second place for Runner's Relay! Yay! Awesome race with the Canoeist, though *coughs* i was like the oldest in school being year 3 and all, but well done juniors! NACC ftw!

3. The last photo taken at 11pm, trying to keep my eyes open while typing this and attempting to do my supply chain project which is due tomorrow but is not half done. #Emergency! And opps, i haven't showered.

These few days i've suddenly come to realise that my time at NP is about to end soon, in a few weeks time study week begins and after the last exams, i probably won't be seeing alot of my classmates/friends for a long time to come since they are going off to other countries for internship. Guess the saying that you never cherish things until you lose them stays true to the end. Throughout these 2.5 years, i daresay i haven't made an effort to try to get to know everyone individually, because of things like being in a "clique" and the same-old judging thing that i'm quitting for real. It's tough, but i'm trying to look beyond the outer shell of a person, deleting the initial impression that is formed over what hearsay does. In the remaining few weeks, my camera and polaroid are going to be my best friends to document at least a part of this journey that has most definitely forged the strongest friendships which would last forever, given as we have so many interests in common.

"Happiness is derived when you stop striving for perfection, but seeing the beauty in imperfection and finding happiness within you". Once i read a story about... wait i forgot how it started. Basically it's about some god who put happiness deep within a man, so that man would never ever find it. Happiness is derived from deep within, not from the circumstances or situations that surround you. You may think getting material possessions would make you happy, but true happiness is derived from self actualization, from achieving something that would make you feel accomplished, from sincerely helping someone. Life IS short, and i may be reaching 2 decades old in a year or so, but now that i have learnt this, it's going to change my world.

In Every Single Way

Came across this while Tumblr-ing and can't help but think about how it's so easy to say, but difficult to put into practise. In this world, tens of dozens of girls wake up everyday thinking "oh shit, i'm so fat" and feel like crap for the rest of the day, putting themselves on ridiculous diets which torture them mentally and physically. Hats off to those who can confidently say, i love myself and accept myself for who i am. To many, comfort is food, food is comfort. Nothing to do? Eat. Feel sad? Eat. These people (including me) have got to realise that there are other methods of relieving this extra energy. Right now i've just gotta find the right outlet that i can sustain in the long run. Meanwhile, the struggle continues....

Grass in Light

edok Sunday

Lazy Sunday spent at Bedok with Canoeist for NCC!

Guess this picture gives the place a little more justice!

Spent an entire day pretty much lazing around at Bedok Reservoir, watching the races go on and on, NP did really well i would say considering it’s a national competition and alll. Well done guys! :) Headed out realllly early, thank goodness Joel wasn’t leaving till 745 or i would’ve to make a lonely 1 hour trip to reach there. These days i’ve been obsessed with skies, and today’s was really pretty amidst the grass and water. How i wish i had a real good camera to take all of these and capture it in my memory forever. CQ brought Nero, and being me not being really a dog person i conquered it and brought it for a walk! (or rather, it walked me considering how big it was). Rushed home to go for dinner at Corpthorne Kings’, awesome and super worth skipping lunch :)